BHBR| How to Listen so People Will Talk

Note: I am so sorry for making this post so late, Bethany House! I am doing my best to catch back up!


How to Listen so People Will Talk

By Becky Harling

My rating- 4 stars



My thoughts…

  • This book contained good pointers and ideas for how to listen so people will be more willing to talk to you. It was clear and concise (not too long of a read either!–I just got behind this time 😦 ).
  • I liked how much Becky used scripture in this book. She pretty much used scripture to support her every point which is the way I think it should be.
  • Chapter five, on asking good questions was probably my favorite chapter because it gave good, constructive ideas throughout.
  • Loved that she used Jesus as the prime foundation and example for our conversations.


1 Peter 2:21 English Standard Version (ESV)

21 For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps.

  • I thought the point she made about gossip was good.
  • I liked how she said that identifying with someone’s feeling on a subject (or validating them) is good (I wouldn’t agree it’s good all the time however.) but not sinful actions. We should not support sinful feelings or actions. If we need to rebuke sinful feelings I believe that we should back it up with scripture.
  • I disagreed very heartily when she said that the feeling of anger isn’t sin. There IS such a thing as righteous anger—but it is VERY seldom that a person’s feeling of anger is actually righteous. And the reason I don’t believe the feeling of anger isn’t a sin is mainly because of this verse…


“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.”

~Matthew 5:21-22 , bolding added.

  • Another thing I disliked was how she came from a much more feelings oriented and psychiatrist perspective. 



Those two things caused me to drop a star because I felt that they were important enough to drop my rating.


Note: I received a free copy of this book from Bethany House in exchange for my honest review. All opinions here expressed are my own. 

Emmaline Lucille (1)



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